A Bit of Advice

I recently attended my high school reunion, and although I had a great time there was one thing that really annoyed me! For those of you who may be attending a reunion in the near future take this as advice of what not to say!

Here goes! I cannot count how many people came up to me and said I did not change at all and looked exactly the same as I did in high school! Now maybe these people had no idea who I am, was, or maybe they were just very drunk, because since high school I have gained 40 pounds, had 2 children, and I don't get any rest! I look nothing like I did 4 years ago, let alone 20! Was this some attempt at flattery? Did these people have nothing else to say? I am dumbfounded!

Now I must admit I did look great, as usual I was groomed very nicely, well accessorized, sucked in where I was supposed to be and lifted where it was deemed necessary. Not one thing was left to chance, every thing I did was calculated so that I could look my best, or as good as any mom of 2 kids under the age of 5 can look. When one is wiping butts all day and making sure that the boogers end up in a tissue and not a mouth, you don't have a lot of time to think about appearance!

You pluck, file, try to firm up with miracle lotions because who has time for exercise?
But no matter how much I prayed, sat up, lotioned up, defrizzed and tweezed, I am never going to resemble the girl I was at 18. Nor do I want to rememble her, except for losing a few pounds, I am happy to be 38, to look 38 and to have all the experience and wisdom of a 38 year old woman!

Anyone who thinks I look exactly the same is a fool!